


be my girl

by crispierchip



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Feminization, M/M, Rimming, Virginity Roleplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-27 01:13:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13869936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crispierchip/pseuds/crispierchip
Summary: “Listen,” Nate starts then.EJ swallows. His hand is on the door handle, and he has to turn around. Nate’s looking down between them, chewing on the inside of his cheek. EJ thinks about bolting.





	be my girl

**Author's Note:**

> i have been calling this my shame fic on twitter bc i was originally too embarrassed to write it. now after looking at it for so long i don’t know why i ever felt that way lmao.
> 
> that being said this story wouldn't even have gotten started much less finished without the encouragement of some wonderful people <3 also not without laura, who always tells me nice things when i need to hear them <3

It’s all because of Tyson. EJ will stand by that.

Tyson is the one who gives Nate the stupid Valentine’s Day card, though it’s not Tyson who offers it to EJ, so maybe it’s Nate’s fault, too, just a bit. Then again, EJ is the one who opens the heart covered card in front of their entire team, so maybe it’s all three of them to blame.

In any case, Nate hands EJ a card that says, “Will you be my girl?” and EJ gets to feel his face burn a fiery red in front of half their team, even though he knows — he _knows_ — it’s a joke. Except he can’t help but think about that, think about being Nate’s girl, and his face heats and not entirely out of embarrassment.

Still, EJ doesn’t know what to do with that, so he laughs it off like the joke it’s meant to be, and stashes the card in the inside pocket of his suit jacket. He bumps his shoulder into Nate’s and tells Tyson he needs to come up with better ideas if he wants to have any game. His voice shakes, a little, but Tyson squawks and the guys are way more interested in that than EJ’s rough voice.

+

EJ is still feeling off balance by the time they’re in Nate’s car — because rule number one when you’re trying to hide your feelings for someone you’re sleeping with is to apparently carpool to work with him — his chest oddly tight and his face still warm. He keeps thinking about how his stomach had tried to curl into itself at the card, and can’t even look at Nate because of it.

Nate’s eyes are focused on the road so he doesn’t realize, but he’s quiet, which only serves to make EJ more nervous. Nate doesn’t say anything on the entire ride over to EJ’s, not until he’s pulling up into EJ’s driveway at least.

“Listen,” Nate starts then.

EJ swallows. His hand is on the door handle, and he has to turn around. Nate’s looking down between them, chewing on the inside of his cheek. EJ thinks about bolting. “Yeah?” he asks instead.

Nate takes a breath, loud. “I’m sorry if that was awkward,” he says. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” He sounds awkward, words almost blending together.

EJ presses his lips together, feels blood rush to his face. “It’s all good,” he mumbles. He thinks his face must be bright red.

“No, it’s—” Nate sighs. “You don’t have to be my Valentine if you don’t want to,” he says. His voice is sulky but honest, and EJ thinks this is truly baffling.

“I mean, I know this wasn’t supposed to be a big deal,” Nate goes on, and this is supremely awkward now. EJ doesn’t want any part of it. “And I guess all the Valentine’s talk got out of — ” EJ is kind of dying inside with how uncomfortable this is, so he sucks it up and cuts Nate off.

“That’s not — that’s not it,” he manages.

Nate looks up at him, confused in a way that EJ’s given up on trying to be immune to. “It’s not?” he asks, slow.

EJ — he doesn’t know why he says what he says next, except he trusts Nate, and he doesn’t want Nate to think he upset EJ. “It was the other part.”

If Nate looked confused before, it’s double the effect now. “The other part,” he says.

EJ huffs. He thinks, in for a penny, in for a pound. “Me being — you know,” he says.

Nate continues to look at EJ for a moment before his eyes abruptly grow wide. “You being my girl?” he asks, quick and inexplicably easy. “Come on, you know I was just messing around,” he goes on, and he sounds relieved.

God, this is worse than pulling teeth, EJ thinks, and he should know. “Yeah, I — of course,” he says, because it turns out he’s all out of courage for the night.

It’s late, and EJ expects Nate to let it drop, maybe wants him to, even, but Nate just narrows his eyes at him. “Is it something else?” he asks.

EJ licks his lips. It is, but he doesn’t know how to explain it, doesn’t want to either. He keeps thinking about Nate laughing, laughing at _him_ , and it wouldn't even be purposefully mean. EJ doesn't say anything, but he doesn’t move to get out of the car either.

Nate keeps looking at him. He opens his mouth and takes a breath like he’s gearing up to say something. Part of EJ hopes Nate is spot on and the rest of him hopes obliviousness wins out.

“Wait,” Nate finally says. “Did you maybe… not want me to be messing around?” he asks.

EJ thinks this is his chance right here, to laugh it off and for both of them to move on from this weird ass conversation, because this is just embarrassing. It has EJ’s stomach up in knots and his face in flames, and it doesn’t even make _sense_.

EJ thinks about all that, and instead of saying anything he shrugs. It feels heavy and stiff, but he can feel the tension between them build with it.

“I — ” Nate starts, cuts himself off. “Wow, that’s…” he says.

EJ braces himself for the word that follows, except it never comes. Seconds pass, and EJ’s chest loosens some and then some more, until he can turns to look at Nate. Nate is looking right at him, and his face is red, too.

Their eyes meet, and the air between shifts, pulling tight with tension. EJ wants to look away but he feels caught, and then Nate is licking his lips, and there’s a buzzing in EJ’s ears. He still hears enough to get, “You want to be my girl?” from Nate and choke on his breath.

It’s audible, and EJ doesn’t trust his voice so he leans across the center console instead and kisses Nate. It’s fumbly in a way it hasn’t been between them for a while, but Nate kisses back, hesitant and soft.

EJ feels his heart beat really hard in his chest, his ears. He keeps expecting Nate to pull back and laugh at him, so he kisses Nate harder to make up for it, and Nate makes a sound against his lips, low and shaky.

“We should probably…” Nate pulls away to say, and that sounds like a good idea.

They step out of the car and suddenly it’s awkward again, the silence and the space between them, and EJ doesn’t have the courage to do anything about it. He feels embarrassed all over again without Nate’s lips to distract him.

His hands feel fumbly, when he reaches for his keys, and it takes him a moment to get the door open. Nate waits patiently, but then it’s just the two of them standing in EJ’s hallway, waiting for nothing.

Then Nate takes a step closer and then another one, and EJ takes one back until his back is pressed to the wall. His face just feels very warm, looking at Nate, thinking about Nate knowing what he wants, and he hasn’t felt like this in a long time.

EJ sort of wants to give Nate an out, because Nate was just joking before, but then Nate is right there, in front of him, and EJ has trouble breathing never mind making words. Nate’s a bit shorter than him, and EJ is acutely aware of that now.

Nate reaches out and wraps his fingers around EJ’s wrist, gentle. EJ’s breath unmistakably catches in his chest, and he struggles to release it. Nate looks up at him, moves his other hand to the back of EJ’s neck. His palm is cold against EJ’s skin, but then again EJ’s skin feels so warm.

“Hey,” Nate says quietly, and then he’s dragging EJ down, just a little, and meeting him the rest of the way until their lips touch.

Back in the car it was kind of desperate, like the first time they had kissed, but this is slower. Nate’s lips are soft and barely there, a tease, and EJ is stuck in place, breathing hard. Nate pulls back and smiles, kisses EJ’s cheek, then his jaw. His lips are dry, but EJ can feel his breath shake.

Nate kisses EJ’s cheekbone after, leans in to whisper into EJ’s ear. EJ can feel Nate’s breath, warm, and his heart thumps in his chest. He lets his eyes slip shut, and then his head lean back against the wall, when he finally feels Nate’s lips on the shell of his ear. EJ feels them part, like Nate is about to say something, only nothing comes, and EJ holds his breath until he can’t anymore.

“Say something,” he says finally, and his voice is rough, used from nothing. “Come on.”

Nate’s throat clicks. He sets his hand on EJ’s hip, warm even though EJ’s shirt. He asks, “Wanna hear about how beautiful you are?” and his voice is soft, sweet almost.

EJ swallows around nothing. He doesn’t know what he wants except he does, underneath all the embarrassment. He doesn’t say anything, just nods, and feels Nate’s eyes on him, hears how Nate breathes in at the admission.

“Jesus,” he says. His fingers dig into EJ’s hip, his forehead resting on EJ’s shoulder. He seems to catch himself then, and he says, “Fuck, you’re so beautiful.” Nate sounds like he means it, and EJ is so warm, all over. His dick is hard in his pants, but the thought doesn’t leave him, that this is kind of weird.

“I want—” Nate starts, then takes a breath. “Should we go upstairs?” he asks.

EJ doesn’t know where this going, but he doesn’t think he wants to find out in the middle of his own hallway so he nods. Lets Nate take his hand and lead him up the stairs, pausing to kiss EJ every few seconds, like he’s maybe worried EJ will run out of courage. EJ doesn’t think he will, but he appreciates this nonetheless, appreciates how careful Nate is being.

Nate pauses when they make it to the bedroom, and EJ steps in front of him, flicks on the lights and then dims them, until the room is bathed in a soft light, nothing too bright. He turns around and meets Nate’s eyes after, just for a second before he has to look away again. He feels— embarrassed works, but exposed fits even better.

Nate sets his hand on EJ’s hip. He takes a step forward and then another, until the two of them are pressed together. He looks up and catches EJ’s lips, kisses him gently. “Tell me if I say something stupid,” he says, and that, unmistakably, makes EJ feel better.

“You won’t,” he says. His voice is gravely and shaky and Nate’s fingers dig into his hipbone.

“Still,” Nate presses.

EJ nods, and feels Nate start to guide him backwards, walking him to the bed. EJ goes, drops onto the mattress once his calves hit the bedframe. Nate joins him, a hand high on EJ’s chest pushing him back.

Everything moves so slow, and then they’re kissing again, Nate’s lips soft and wet and hardly there at all. Nate's hand is still on EJ’s chest, rubbing slow circles over his sternum, and he slowly pushes his leg between EJ’s, presses his thigh along EJ’s erection.

EJ’s breath shakes in his chest, under Nate’s palm, and he digs his fingers into Nate’s bicep, holding on. He kisses Nate back and feels Nate moves his hand down, over EJ’s side. Tries to chase his lips when Nate pulls back.

“Is it okay if I touch you here?” Nate asks, voice low.

It takes EJ a moment, to get what Nate is referring to, and then he feels Nate fingers squeeze his ribs and it clicks. He feels a full body shudder go through him but he nods. Tries to breathe evenly, and then Nate’s dragging his hand up, cupping EJ’s pec like — like it’s a breast, and EJ doesn’t know what to do with that except struggle to breathe.

“Not even wearing a bra.” Nate chuckles, “Kind of slutty,” he says, and EJ thought he was red before but it doesn’t compare to how warm his face feels now.

“Nate,” he says and has nothing to follow it with.

Nate just hums. He moves to kiss EJ’s throat, as much as he can while EJ is still dressed, and his thumb rubs over EJ’s nipple, a gentle pressure through EJ’s button-down. EJ’s nipples are hard, and he thinks he has goosebumps breaking all over his skin. His eyes are squeezed shut and he can’t help the way his hips hitch, pressing his hard-on against Nate’s thigh.

Nate smiles, EJ can feel it against his throat. He asks, “Yeah?” and EJ doesn’t know what he means but he nods anyway.

Nate’s fingers move to the buttons of EJ’s shirt, from the top all the way to the bottom, undoing them, and then his palm is on EJ’s stomach, moving up and up. EJs doesn’t even—he doesn’t _have_ breasts, but with the Nate is touching him it’s easy to get lost in the illusion.

His breath catches when Nate touches his pec again, this time skin to skin, and he arches his back, just a little, pressing into the touch. Nate keeps kissing him, his thumb working EJ’s nipple until it’s stiff and sensitive.

“Can I take this off you?” Nate pulls back to ask then. He’s holding onto the hem of EJ’s shirt, and this isn’t a big deal but it feels like one.

It takes EJ a moment and then he finally says, “Yeah,” in this voice like he’s been swallowing gravel all day.

Nate leans in to kiss him again while he pushes EJ’s shirt off his shoulder, but pulls back after a moment so EJ can fully take it off. He moves his mouth to EJ’s throat after, and his chest, slow and measured until EJ is breathing even harder.

EJ threads his fingers through Nate’s hair and lets his head fall back. He presses his chest into Nate’s mouth and bites his lips when Nate wraps his lips around EJ’s nipple, tries to keep quiet. Nate uses his teeth as much as his lips, and EJ stays quiet until he can’t anymore.

He starts making these sounds, and they’re embarrassing but Nate seems to like them. He hums appraisingly, and then his hand moves down and down still, to EJ’s belt, undoes it and slips his fingers into EJ’s slacks.

He moves two fingers down the front of EJ’s boxers and says, “You’re so wet,” in this quiet voice, and EJ feels his stomach quiver. He forgets to breathe for a moment, and when he finally does it’s tight, shaky.

Nate’s fingers feel hesitant but his lips aren’t, and EJ doesn’t know how to say his words, so he rocks his hips into Nate’s hand, just a little. Nate lets out a breath, keeps working his fingers over the tip of EJ’s dick.

EJ can feel himself get wetter down there, precome messing up his boxers. He says, in a sudden burst of courage, “It’s all for you,” and feels as much as hears Nate’s groan.

“Yeah?” Nate murmurs. He moves his fingers over the wet patch on EJ’s boxers and EJ whimpers.

Nate kisses his way up to EJ’s jaw again, his ear, lips brushing EJ’s skin as he says, “I really want to eat you out right now.”

EJ — he moans, this deep, uneven thing that leaves his stripped bare. His thighs shake and his hips quiver, trying to press harder into Nate’s hand. “Please,” he says, his mouth moving on its own accord.

Nate pulls back, so slow. He kneels between EJ’s legs and pulls his slacks off, throws them over the side of the bed somewhere. He lays down on his stomach after, starts paying kisses on EJ’s stomach, his hips.

EJ moves his fingers through Nate’s hair and spreads his legs, just a little. He feels naked even though he isn’t, and he wants to watch Nate do this but also not, so he lets out a breath and throws his arm over his eyes.

If possible, everything feels that much more now. Nate pushes EJ’s legs a bit farther apart, and then he moves to kiss EJ’s knees, his thighs. He kisses EJ where he’s wet too, over his boxers, and that's the worst part. It has EJ shaking and making incoherent sounds, hips hitching up into Nate’s mouth at random moments.

“You smell so good here,” Nate says, and EJ feels his face burn.

It’s almost a relief when Nate finally drags EJ’s boxers down his legs, but then EJ’s completely naked, and he’s not even looking at himself but he feels it everywhere. He feels it even more when Nate licks over EJ’s hard dick, long and broad and not swallowing him down, almost like — fuck.

EJ tries to keep quiet but he fails pretty spectacularly, and once he starts it’s as if he can’t stop. He keeps moaning, choked off and too high and Nate keeps praising him for it.

“I love the way you sound,” he says, and, when EJ tries to shut himself up because of how embarrassed he feels, “Don’t do that.”

“Nate,” EJ just says, and it comes out too high, jesus.

“You like this, baby?” Nate murmurs, and EJ doesn’t know what to do with that, not with the question and not with the baby either, except nod.

“You like when I lick your clit?” Nate goes on, relentless.

EJ didn’t think this could possibly get more embarrassing or more hot, but here he fucking is, leaking precome all over Nate’s hand because Nate won’t shut up.  “Oh god,” he says, and, “Please,” and he thinks some of that makes Nate snap.

He pulls back, takes EJ’s knees and pushes them towards his chest. He says, “Hold yourself open for me, sweetheart,” and his voice is rough and barely calm.

EJ does as Nate tells him, moves his hands under his knees and holds himself open like that, and he’s done this so many times because Nate loves it, but it all feels so monumentally different now.

EJ’s eyes are still squeezed shut, but he can practically feel Nate staring at him, and it’s — its a lot. He says, “Nate, come on,” and that seems to kick Nate into gear.

“Sorry, just — you look so good here,” he says,, too fucking honest. EJ whimpers, and then his body shakes when he feels Nate lean in, his breath warm against EJ’s hole.

Nate loves to tease, EJ knows that, but his thighs still quiver as Nate kisses between his cheeks, along his hole and never quite where EJ wants him. EJ keeps whimpering, working his hips to get Nate to move it already, but it doesn’t serve to move things any faster.

“Nate,” EJ says, when he can’t help it anymore. “Please.”

EJ can feel the sharp breath Nate lets out at that last word, and he throws his head back, relieved. Then he feels Nate spread his cheeks and he makes another noise, so sharp. He feels exposed all over and this is Nate but it’s still another person.

“You’re okay,” Nate tells him, like he gets EJ’s uneasiness. “I love you like this,” he says, and it’s like a vice around EJ’s heart, squeezing and squeezing until Nate’s lips are finally on him again, on his hole, wet and gentle, almost coaxing.

Nate starts kissing EJ, slow and slick, and then his tongue is there too, and EJ can’t even find enough breath to fill his lungs. He struggles to breathe, his face getting warmer and warmer as Nate works him open, and then it’s his tongue fucking EJ open, and EJ is pretty sure, no matter how many times they do this he’ll never be over it.

“Does it feel good?” Nate pulls back to ask. His breathing is rough, his voice too, and EJ can’t help it, he has to look.

Nate’s fully dressed in his suit, his lips red and swollen, but he’s looking at EJ like he’s the best thing he’s ever seen. EJ’s never felt more naked or more hot in his whole entire life. “Yeah, fuck, Nate,” he says. “Keep going,” and, “Please,” again.

“Keep doing what?” Nate says.

EJ blinks. He can’t —

“Tell me what you want me to do,” Nate says, relentless.

“I—” EJ means to say that he can’t, but it’s just — it’s only Nate. And he hasn’t laughed so far, EJ doesn’t think he’s going to.

Part of EJ wants to close his eyes again, but he keeps them open, says, “I want you to —” and runs out of courage.

“You can do it, come on,” Nate says. He runs gentle hands over EJ’s thighs, leans in to kiss where his hands touch. “Tell me where you want my mouth.”

EJ takes another breath, and it feels huge. “I want you — I want your mouth on my pussy,” eh says, voice so, so quiet. He lets his head fall back right after, can’t bear to look at Nate any more, but Nate only says, “Fuck, you’re so hot,” and leans in again, his tongue warm and soft between EJ’s cheeks.

Nate keeps going like that, keeps going until EJ is dripping precome on his own stomach, hips rocking to push himself back on Nate’s tongue. EJ thinks this is loudest he’s ever been in bed, but he’s all out of embarrassment for the night, which is probably what makes him say, “I — Fuck me,” without his voice shaking at all.

Nate pulls back after a moment. He’s breathing hard again, trying to catch his breath, and he just looks at EJ. “Yeah?” he says, slow.

And EJ has no idea how it happens, except the words that leave his mouth are, “I want you to fuck my pussy,” and his face can’t even turn any redder. Probably.

As it is, Nate’s eyes grow wide, and he scrambles to climbs up the bed. He’s still dressed, and he wipes his mouth on his shirtsleeve before leaning in to kiss EJ. He pulls back after a moment, too soon, but there’s a familiar gleam in his eye. He nuzzles the spot where EJ’s shoulder meets his neck and asks, “Have you done this before?”

EJ frowns at him for a second because he most definitely has. He’s done it with Nate too, so he can’t really say he gets Nate’s question. Then Nate asks him, “Or is this your first time?” and a shiver goes through EJ, his stomach going up in knots.

He looks at Nate dumbly before saying a lame, “I…” and trailing off.

Nate catches on all too soon. “Don’t be embarrassed, baby,” he says, soft. “I just want to know so I can go slow,” he continues. “Take care of you.”

EJ thinks about that, and his heart just beats really hard, hard enough that he can feel it in his ears. He swallows. “Yeah, it’s —” he tries. “I haven’t…”

“That’s okay,” Nate says quickly. “We can do whatever you want,” he goes on. He presses his lips to EJ’s pulse point, and maybe he can feel how it’s racing.

“I want to feel you inside me,” EJ says, though it comes out as more of a whisper.

Nate’s nails dig into EJ’s hip, just for a second before his fingers loosen again. He lets out a breath and smiles. “Anything,” he says.

EJ breathes out too. Then he wraps his arm around the back of Nate’s neck and pulls him in for a kiss, lets Nate move his hand down EJ’s stomach. He spreads his legs and gasps when Nate presses two fingers to the tip of his dick, spreads the precome around.

“You’re still so wet,” Nate says. His fingers are gentle but his voice rough and EJ runs out of patience. He wraps his fingers around Nate’s wrist and moves his hand down between his legs, to his hole.

“Come on,” he says, and, “Fuck me.”

“Fuck, baby,” Nate grunts. “We should go slow,” he says, rubbing his thumb over EJ’s slick, loosened hole. He presses some and then some more, until his thumb slips in, and then groans. “You’re so tight, I don’t want to hurt you.”

EJ’s heart is going crazy in his chest. He doesn’t want to try and parse out now why this is working for him so much. Wants to close his legs instead just to take a break, take a breath, but he wants Nate to keep touching him more.

“You won’t,” he says. He curves his palm over the side of Nate’s face and kisses him, feeling Nate’s breath shake when their lips touch.

They keep kissing for a while, slow, their eyes shut, and then Nate starts fucking EJ with one finger. It’s a bit dry, and EJ keeps shifting to try and find a comfortable angle, until Nate eventually pulls back.

He stretches across the bed to get to the nightstand, and EJ tries to squash down the sudden burst of disappointment that spreads through him. He wants to insist that he’s good, that he doesn’t need any lube, but this can’t actually work without it.

Nate turns around then, and he just kisses EJ, hard enough that EJ can’t stand to think about anything but Nate’s lips on his own. He can still feel Nate’s hands working between them, but they feel like an afterthought now.

EJ jerks when Nate's fingers move back between his legs, but he spreads them easily, lets Nate press one finger inside and then two, fucking EJ with them. It takes EJ longer than usual, to relax around them, even with Nate kissing him. He tries, but he still doesn’t quite get there until Nate starts talking again.

“You’re so wet here,” he says, and EJ knows that’s the lube but he preens, proud. “I can’t wait to be inside you,” Nate goes on, and he sounds so incredibly honest.

“Come on,” EJ tells him, voice harsh enough to match Nate’s. He spreads his legs farther, and feels Nate add another finger.

“Gotta open you up first, baby,” Nate says. He kisses EJ’s throat and his jaw, and EJ tries to rub off against Nate’s stomach and doesn’t really manage it.

“I — I’m good, I can take you,” EJ insists.

He can feel Nate's resolve break then. He pulls back and rests his forehead against EJ’s shoulder, mutters, “You’re gonna kill me.”

EJ thinks that’s good, that Nate knows how it feels now. He chuckles, and runs his fingers through Nate’s hair, nudges his head up so he can kiss him. “Come on,” he says again.

Nate finally goes this time. He reaches behind himself and comes up with a condom that he quickly rolls on. He kisses EJ and gently guides him on his back, rolling over on top of him. EJ can take Nate’s weight easily, but this time Nate is careful, supporting himself on his elbows instead of EJ. It makes EJ feel delicate, the gesture, and he kisses Nate back softly.

Nate shifts his weight after a moment so he can reach between them, guide himself inside EJ. It’s a stretch, and EJ breathes in and forgets to breathe out for a moment. Nate pauses, nose pressed to EJ’s throat, and waits him out.

“Okay?” he asks after a second.

EJ lets his legs fall a little farther apart, hikes his thigh up higher around Nate’s side. Nate pulls back and meets his eyes, and EJ says, “Yeah.” He smiles, moves up to kiss Nate again. Nate rocks his hips, working a bit more of his dick inside EJ, and EJ’s mouth falls open on a gasp with no sound.

“You feel so good,” Nate says then, and EJ feels the warmth return to his face.

Nate keeps rocking his hips, and then he pulls out, pushes back in a bit harder, hard enough to fuck EJ’s breath out from his lungs. “Jesus,” EJ says, throwing his head back. Nate just bites at his throat, gentle nibs that will leave marks.

“Still okay?” he asks, and it doesn’t feel quite great, not until Nate shifts his hips a bit, and then it suddenly feels _too_ good, Nate’s dick hitting EJ just right. Nate gets it, and starts moving faster, until EJ can hardly breathe, and then he moves even faster.

“Are you close?” he asks, and EJ was close when Nate got him out of his clothes. He nods. “Touch yourself,” Nate goes on, “PLay with your tits for me,” he says, and EJ actually feels the fire that breaks out over his face.

He wants to play dumb, but they’re beyond that, he thinks. EJ moves his hand between their chests instead, cups his pec and pinches his nipple between his fingers. He can feel his dick leaking on his stomach, and he pinches his nippe harder, until it feels raw and too sensitive.

“Nate,” he murmurs, hands fisted in the sheets. “Please,” he says, “I—”

“Yeah, sweetheart, what do you need?” Nate asks. His breathing is labored and his arms have started to shake from holding himself up.

“Can I?” EJ asks, and his hand twitches by his side.

Nate, instead of saying anything, moves his own had between them.  He starts rubbing the head of EJ’s dick with two fingers, and EJ’s so sensitive it _hurts_. He buries his face into Nate’s shoulder and whimpers, and Nate works him a little faster.

EJ’s toes curl against the bed, his eyes squeezed shut, and he feels it build and build until his dick pulses and he comes, coating Nate’s hand and his own stomach. Nate wraps slick fingers around him and strokes him through it, and EJ breathes out in relief, lashes wet and sticking together.

Nate is shaking, EJ can feel it, and he can see it too when he opens his eyes. He moves up to kiss him once, and then he rolls them over and straddles Nate’s thighs, starts moving. It’s dry again, and Nate feels huge inside EJ, but he’s breathing hard, fingers digging into EJ’s hips.

It’s probably too slow, EJ’s rhythm, but it seems to be working for Nate. He keeps biting his lips and gasping at random moments, and then he shudders and comes, nails leaving indents on EJ’s skin.

They breathe together after, until EJ feels like he’s going to collapse from exhaustion and climbs off Nate slowly. Nate, sounding extremely not pleased about it, gets up to toss the condom in the trash. EJ wants to be worried now that he’s alone, except his brain still doesn’t quite function, and Nate is back too soon anyway.

He's snaked, when moves to lie next to EJ, and Nate is an octopus on any regular post coital situation, but the effect seems to be doubled this time. He wraps both arms and legs around EJ and pulls him to his chest, squeezes him really tightly.

EJ grumbles for a bit but he secretly loves it. He relaxes into it for a moment before it all starts to come back to him, and he freezes abruptly. His brain feels moderately more functional now, and he thinks — he should probably —

“Stop it,” Nate tells him, or more like mutters. “Now is cuddle time,” he says.

EJ wants to argue, but Nate is so warm, and his huge arm feels good where it’s wrapped around EJ’s chest. Still, he says, “You…” but trails off, uncertain.

Nate sighs, extremely put upon.

“You didn’t mind that?” EJ says, all in a rush.

“Huh?” Nate mumbles. He sounds very sleepy but EJ is nowhere close. “Why would I mind?”

“It was — it was kind of weird,” EJ says. His face starts burning again, and he feels awkward.

Behind him, Nate shrugs. “So?” he asks. When EJ says nothing, Nate breathes out and makes EJ roll over. He waits for EJ to meet his eyes, and then he leans in to kiss him, once, very soft. “I had a good time, you had a good time,” he says. Then, quietly, “Right?”

And it’s hard for EJ to admit to this, but Nate’s mouth is pinched with worry, and EJ can’t stand the thought of him feeling guilty over this. “Yeah,” he says, and nods for good measure.

Nate lets out a breath. “Then it’s no big deal,” he says.

EJ looks at him. “Still weird though,” he says.

Nate rolls his eyes. He lies back down and proceeds to wrap himself around EJ again. “Cuddle time,” he says again, like he can cuddle EJ out of his embarrassment.

Weirdly enough, EJ falls asleep not long after, so maybe Nate can.

+

EJ wakes up first, the next morning. He finds they somehow migrated under the covers, sometime during the night, so he’s careful not to jostle Nate too much as he slips out from the bed.

He takes a quick shower and moves down to the kitchen, where he tackles the other part of Nate’s joke that’s been on his mind. EJ is by no means a wiz in the kitchen, but he has pancake mix and he owns a pan, so he works with those. More importantly, however, he has chocolate syrup and a plate.

When Nate finally gets downstairs, EJ is ready for the big reveal. He has set the plate and the pancakes on the table, and gets to watch Nate’s eyes grow wide as he takes everything in.

Then, in what has no relation to the plan whatsoever, Nate’s eyes narrow. He asks, “Is this about last night?” and doesn’t wait for EJ’s answer before launching into a rant about how EJ doesn’t owe him anything, and he doesn’t want to eat this if it’s apology food, and —

“Nate,” EJ tells him. He smiles toothlessly and gestures to the plate with the handwritten chocolate syrup words.

_will u be my valentine_

Nate’s eyes widen for a second time, and this time he smiles after instead of growing suspicious. He looks at EJ and walks over to him, crowds him against the breakfast counter. “You’re serious?” he asks.

EJ rolls his eyes, but he’s blushing. “Yes, I’m serious,” he says.

Nate smiles even wider. He leans in to kiss EJ. He mumbles, “Yes,” against EJ’s lips.

**Author's Note:**

> if you enjoyed reading this self-indulgent mess you can find me over at twitter @hearteyesmofo where i generally try not to lose my shit over rarepairs :D


End file.
